Down

I have been feeling a little down lately.

Mostly that has to do with my prick of a boss. He's a self-important, condescending, patronising interfering pompous ass who I am really trying to get along with just to make my days bearable, but so far it's been only partially successful.

I am not getting anywhere in my current company, and I hate the way things are going there, so I have decided to leave. I haven't resigned yet, but I have passed my CV on to an ex-colleague and I am interviewing there next month. So I should be excited, right? Well, not yet. Maybe I will be if and when I get the job. In the meantime, I'll be unhappy if I want to.

My mood was not enhanced by going to see Rendition tonight. It's a thought-provoking film, let's say, that left me wondering about the state of the world, of governments, and mankind in general. On the way home, I got stopped at temporary traffic lights at some roadworks and while I was stopped I switched my phone back on to find I had a missed call from Mary. Not too long ago, I would have called her right back, but knowing that he would be listening to our every word made me shut the phone. She left no message so it couldn't have been important. I no longer have to speak to her; it just doesn't matter any more.

Finally, to cap it all, my good friend L sent me a text:
"U free to chat?"
"Sure," I replied.
She called me a few minutes later. Her friend from college, who she's known for 27 years, has meningitis and doesn't recognise her own daughter. L is very sensitive to these things and she's devastated. She talked about her friend in the past tense. As if she's already dead.

It put my petty feelings into perspective, that's for sure.

She invited me round to her place to keep her company tomorrow evening.