Not fair

"Hi," said Mary, sounding a little sorry for herself.

"What's up?" I asked.

"I've got a migraine, and I can't concentrate properly. I'm not going to be able to make it tonight."

"Okay," I said. "Just reschedule when you're feeling better."

I think she's stalling.

I am apparently obliged by law to support my wife, even though she has left me, taken my son with her, cleaned out our bank account, got us into debt forcing me to sell our house and now her new boyfriend Neil has plans to buy a house for them to live in.

Is that fair?

I, too, have consulted a legal advisor, and I am advised to bide my time. If her situation moves towards one where she is being supported by someone else, my obligation to her fades, although I am still responsible for our son. That I'm happy with.

On Tuesday we have an introductory session with a mediation service. The intention is that they will arbitrate a financial settlement, but that won't happen until a future session, which we may be forced to pay for (and I can't afford). I will, however, be taking evidence of her financial misconduct; just in case.

I have discovered that who sues who, and who is at fault matters not in a divorce case. The court is looking only for sufficient evidence that the marriage has 'irretrievably broken down'. I think this one qualifies, don't you? It is not impossible for blame to be introduced in a financial settlement, however. I believe I have a fairly strong case to claim that she owes me a lot more than I owe her. The problem is ascertaining the true value of her stable of horses and her dogs, to which I am entitled to half. Maybe she knows that. Maybe that's why she's stalling.